“No plan survives contact”
Exercise Cockney Muir was a remote mountaineering Adventure Training exercise organised by 135 Geo Sqn RE, to trek the John Muir Trail through the Sierra Nevada, California. There were 12 participants from a variety of backgrounds including Regulars and Reservists; old/young, fit/less-fit, attractive/hideous, and the list goes on. On a Wednesday morning at the end of July, everybody gathered at the Reserves Centre in Ewell, Surrey for a kit issue and last minute preparation - surprisingly the kit was all relatively new and lightweight, not the decade old kit that I was expecting – a good start.
The following day the team boarded a mini bus and headed to Heathrow for the long-haul flight to San Francisco. Checking in was a breeze for most but the first challenge was for Spr Oliver “Penny” Farthing, who somehow offended the check-in attendant and was duly sent on a wild goose chase around the terminal with his ‘oversize luggage’ - which was exactly the same as everyone else’s – after 20 minutes of this a slightly suspicious man took his bag and we all hoped it wouldn’t appear at the other end!! After a quick change in New York we arrived in San Francisco and as we were travelling on NATO travel orders we went through the diplomatic immigration channel to comments from a larger than life American woman shouting “that's a hell of a lot of diplomats”. Unfortunately - everybody’s bags made it to the US safely and we headed into the city, arriving gone 2300 hrs at a dodgy ‘downtown motel’ – we survived the night.
The next day everybody broke down into teams and went off with jobs to do - I was on food purchases, so we headed off to a cash and carry and bought $400 dollars worth of supply’s to enable us to eat for the first half of the trip. It was soon very clear it would be hard to fit 8 days worth of food into our rucksacks with all the other kit that we had to carry. So, as we were leaving the next day, any extra clothes that had been brought were dumped to reduce our weight and the majority of people felt that binning them was appropriate. However, two members of the team decided to be charitable and donate to the local homeless population - they both appeared back at the hotel in the early hours wearing just boxer shorts and socks – the tone for the trip was set.
A walk, tube, train and coach ride later we arrived at the Yosemite national park to collect our permits and hire bear canisters (bear proof tubs big enough to be a nightmare to pack into your rucksack but not big enough to fit a weeks worth of food). This was to be the first night sleeping under the stars but not yet in the wilderness, it enabled people to practice their tent erection and morning routine, this was especially helpful for Cpl Shane Morley who’s tent was very limp after his first attempt but some helpful hints from the lads and it was certainly up (not well, but up). On day 4 of the trip we woke early and boarded another bus to the start of the trail head, we were finally there, in the wilderness …..... well, almost the wilderness, we had a spectacular view of Half Dome but we were sharing it with 300 tourists. We pushed on and had a few hours worth of trekking to test and adjust before we got to the prearranged camp site. With a few hours of daylight left we pitched tents, cooked dinner and I had the best job of digging a latrine. During the first night around the camp fire the seniors told story's of “the good old days when the army was fun” with the prime suspect being Capt “Nessie” Smith who has done everything and anything that has ever happened, possibly inventing fire, the karma sutra and the wheel. During the night I was awoken to the sound of rustling outside my tent, with the real possibility of bears in the area, I arose, walking stick and knife in hand, to discover a heard of deer foraging around the camp site - and back to sleep it was.
On day 5 we rose at dawn and were walking 90 minutes later, a cheeky 14 miler with over a mile of height gain throughout the day made it clear that there were different levels of fitness amongst the group, the day also highlighted the extreme temperature changes that we would be facing, freezing during the night and boiling (up to 95F) in the mid-day heat. As we progressed along the John Muir trail there were the obvious ups and downs, Spr Liam Loughran complained about almost everything, Capt Rupert Hurry (our doctor) said on a particularly steep assent that it is “medically possible to breath out of your arse”, Spr Victor Leung became strange and compulsive, and Cpl Shane Morley never learned to put up a tent. The trail itself took us over some high passes seeing snow, through river valleys with crystal clear streams, passed ancient woodland, across open plains and into areas devastated by forest fire, a truly amazing mix of scenery. The main point that became apparent was that John Muir didn’t like contouring but preferred to zigzag up and down mountains continuously - he apparently did it on a horse, so cheated a bit.
After 7 days of amazing scenery, lots of ups and downs, and many conversations with Americans who “just loved” that we were from the Military, we approached the half way point at Vermilion Valley, having covered about 100 miles. We walked to where we should have got picked up by a boat to take us to the Vermilion Valley Resort for a rest day and to resupply, but the lake had been half drained due to a 2 year California drought, so an extra couple of miles across the river bed was required before we reached the waters edge. The evening went well with a large meal and a few beers enjoyed by all. Unfortunately, at this point, I had developed an infection within my foot and Spr John Diston had been coping with large blisters across the entirety of both of his feet. So, the next day the doctor effectively said that Spr Diston and I would not be able to continue the trek and would have to meet the group at the end – after some hastily re-arranged travel and logistics we waved the group off the following day and extracted ourselves back to civilisation.
The rest of the group set off for the remaining 130 mile trek to Mt Whitney, refreshed and ready for more wilderness - and cold beer at the end. However, in classic, “no plan survives contact with the enemy” style, things were not to go to plan. The second half of the trip was more remote and the passes were higher, averaging around 12,000ft. But…after five beautiful and simply awesome days, passing through places with names like Evolution Meadow, Muir Pass and Crater Mountain, things took a turn for the worse. Major Batey had been feeling unwell for a few days and when his condition worsened, he and the exercise doctor decided to call for assistance from the Park Rangers. They in turn called in the Air Medic, who assessed the situation and decided to evacuate Maj Batey – the guys sat around patiently as this all took several hours and took turns to run up the hill to get a Satphone signal. After waiving off the Helicopter and a very sad looking boss, Capt Nessie Smith then decided to get the team to the nearest road head 25 miles away as he did not have enough qualified personnel to safely continue with the trek – effectively ending the trek after covering around 207 miles – the bear they spotted on the way to the road was a small consolation for their change of route.
This is were we come back in to the story - In order to get the team back together we hired a 15 seater van and drove to Fresno to collect, firstly Maj Batey from hospital (he’s ok now) and then the rest of the group from the wilderness. After an emotional reunion, a drive along the bendiest road in America, and an overnight stay in the Motel where they filmed ‘Psycho’, the group headed to Los Angles for a few days R&R. We arrived a day before our Hostel reservation but WO2 Mark Austin-Ellis managed to square away room upgrades for the group, the only bad part of the deal was that we were staying in Inglewood – not the best part of town. The next couple of days were spent exploring L.A and relaxing by the pool before heading back to England.
Overall the trip did not go to plan – but it was definitely an enjoyable adventure which took everyone out of their comfort zone – I think that’s what adventure training is all about, so, all in all I would say it was a resounding success - I would do it all again at the drop of a hat if the opportunity arose.
LCpl Joe Atkins
